NEW JOB!!!!

Aha! Finally, I hate fridays.....have for a long time. I love what I do and I have worked so hard to get were Im. To have them try and take it away because of my personal life is stupid. Today how ever life change for me. I went to just apply at elephant bar, kinda just for fun. Pracite for the future interviews. And unbeanouce to me they looked at me and said we llike you alot and would love to have you on our team. I felt so at home and at ease with everyone and the managers. For once I felt okay with my authority figures. Not having to walk around on egg shells and worry about being fired for being right. I like it there, better hours,better everything.
yet it will be hard to leave something I have put my effort into so much, and never felt/got apperiatiion for it. I love everyone so much but I got to think about me. The shadyness of fridays has taken its toll on me and everyone. WARNING TO EVERYONE: PLEASE!!! GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!! RUN. Its Obvious that Im unhappy if Im willing to give up my hard work to be a bartender to become a server again. well sometimes you got do what you got do.

Anyways Im excited, but I have to be there @ 8am for orienation. Wish me luck.

Karma

She is a bitch.
comes by 3's
and now I feel that she has come for me
what have I done
I dont know
but for those that have done what they have done
to me
i dont care
tomorrow i still be here
and one day karma
she come for you too
so all this might be funny to you now
laugh
have your fun
it wont affect me
no matter what i face
I learn today
to just be me....and face the music

and another bites the dust.....

Im not sorry for who I am.
Sorry that the truth hurts more then a lie.
The moment I said it
The moment I opened my mouth
I knew were it was headed
we all did
One day your eyes too will open to this world that we see
One day you'll call

Maybe it is my curse

In your regin you broke a alot
but then you ttried to break me
how could you?
I guess too at this moment I shall repent my sins
for Im not perfect
After everything.....everything
this is it
that you only meant well
of coruse you did
But LIES hurt even the white ones

I from this day will not lie ever again. Promise.

Oh dear friend, I will wish you for the best do know that it is not my job to correct you, only yours.
I can only guide you from my knowlegde
but this old broken soul
knows that battles to fight to save to be
I will not fight you for what is the point the only thing that fights
slove is nothing
blood will not fix what has been done
it cant
angry words were exchanged and hearts are stabed
but do note
tthat if your hurt then your hurt
I sopke how I feel nothing is wrong with that
Not if what i speak is what I know
and when the lies you weave come back at you
note that you cant weave them in to more

you just cant

its in the abc of grown up
dont lose you head
none of us are angels
but yet.......

I hope you find your peace out there
I hope you find what it is that your looking to find
but today I put you on that list
sorry I really hate putting poeple on there but what is done is done

rest in peace

• 
  

Learning Life

I guess we spend our whole lives learning. Learning whats wrong and whats right.....most learn from our own mistakes and yet we still learn some from other mistakes. I think tonite that I have begun to see the true meaning of the things around me. What it is to live....and while nothing in life comes easy and hardships are never a far off thought; it is what we surround ourself with that make us.
At this moment I wont lie and say Im fine...Im not. Im facing alot in my life, alot of changing. Tonite I was so upset that the fact that I told one of my best friend not drive home because she had been drinking and she did. Im sick to my stomach with the thoughts of what could happen to her and to others. I myself have nearly been killed by the dangers of drunk driving and the fact that she did not think was upsetting to me. I love her and while I was harsh in my message I hope she understands that what I said was with the best intentions for her. One day I hope she understands that and doesnt resent me for it.


Please I wish everyone the best tonite and bless them with safety
peacce
for the night